Help!

HELP!

 

Serving the people who serve us

“Years ago when I worked as a bartender at a local lesbian bar, musician Top Jimmy came in drunk—as was his usual state—carrying a bag of Mexican food. He and his friends made their way to the loft overlooking the pool table and proceeded to loudly comment on the game in progress. After many jeers thrown back and forth between the participants at the table and the Jimmy crew upstairs, I looked up in time to see a plastic cup of salsa arch over the rail and descend towards the pool table. It seemed to travel in slow motion, unlike the gang of lesbians who mad-rushed the stairs with the intent of ending Top Jimmy’s legendary career as a drunken balladeer. Although I was the last one up those stairs, I managed to talk the girls down and have Jimmy removed from the bar with out any serious harm done to his body. Sometime later I was saddened when I read about Jimmy’s death in Tim Grobaty’s column for the Press-Telegram. And then when I read Grobaty’s retraction the next day and Jimmy’s miraculous hospital-bed recovery, I laughed. Top Jimmy had escaped the clutches of death once again.”

PIZZA BOYS! WAITRESSES! SEND US YOUR STORIES. SUBMISSIONS [at] THEDISTRICTWEEKLY [dot] COM.

 
close Reblog this comment
blog comments powered by Disqus
 

© 2007-2008 Seven Days Publishing LLC.