Anonymous confessions of a bartender
As told to Kevin Ferguson

“I used to work at this nightclub where tons of shit would go down. One night we had this group of girls in the VIP room who were getting completely ripped. The whole thing started off pretty typically until this one girl (by far the drunkest in the group) started hitting on the manager and putting on a strip show for her girlfriends. Once she was totally naked, she realized she had to pee, and asked where the bathroom was. I gave her directions, but it was no use—she peed all over the floor of the VIP room.

“Not too long afterwards she got into an argument with one of her girlfriends, things got ugly pretty quickly and they ended up wrestling each other on the floor, splashing in and around the newly formed pee puddle. To top off everything that night, she went home with the manager. The next day, when we asked him how his night went, the manager had mixed feelings: he took her home and dumped her in the bathtub for a half hour before boning her. After they slept together the girl went outside to her car to get something and never came back. That was the last we ever saw of her.”

HEY, BARTENDER—SPILL IT! SEND YOUR SECRETS (ANONYMITY GUARANTEED) TO SUBMISSIONS [at] THEDISTRICTWEEKLY [dot] COM.