Dept: Control Z

CONTROL Z

April 2, 2008

This Week: Puerto Fantastico, Grain Aid and Charles Manson
Mon | MAR 24 Steve Lowery announces his departure from The District for Los Angeles CityBeat, depriving adoring interns and possibly several staffers of the surrogate father-figure they’d come to love if never quite know. His replacement (for almost all intents and purposes) is the District writer [...]

VECTOR CONTROL

March 26, 2008

This Week: Corpse Guy, Greenpeace, Zombie Jesus
Tues | Mar 18 I am going to tell you to do something now, so get that stupid look off your face. Okay. Go to your computation box and sign on to der Interweb, divulging all personal information as quickly as possible and without so much as a [...]

VECTOR CONTROL

March 19, 2008

This Week: Geraldine Ferraro, Horton Hears A Who! and Iraq Veterans Against the War
Tues | Mar 11 A few days ago, Long Beach’s defacto local paper, the South Bay Daily Breeze, printed a little story in anticipation of an appearance by 1984 Democratic Vice Presidential candidate Geraldine Ferraro in Torrance. The story was noteworthy if [...]

VECTOR CONTROL

March 12, 2008

This Week: Progressive Wiccans, the Press-Telegram and four-hour erections
Tues | Mar 4 The Long Beach City Council votes unanimously to “reevaluate” the hundreds of thousands of dollars it spends with the Press-Telegram every year, now that the paper will be operated by the publisher of the Daily Breeze in Torrance. But, despite the paper’s drastic [...]

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March 5, 2008

Tues | Feb 26 The trial of Beachcomber publisher Jay Beeler begins. Beeler is up on charges of obstructing a police officer and disobeying the order of a police officer—prosecutors did drop other charges of looking a police officer directly in the eye and failure to genuflect. Beeler got popped the night of March 28, [...]

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February 27, 2008

Tues | Feb 19 Found out today there is an apartment building in Alamitos Beach that is home to 12 sex offenders. That’s right, 12 sex offenders all living under the same roof—which, coincidentally, was the original concept for Two and a Half Men. We didn’t find out about this until KFI’s John and Ken [...]

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February 20, 2008

Tues | Feb 12 Nothing’s changed.
Wed | Feb 13 Pitching great Roger Clemens testifies before a Congressional committee that he never used steroids or the human growth hormone. Brian McNamee testifies before the same panel—but what does McNamee know? He was just Clemens’ trainer. Clemens and McNamee’s diametrically opposed stories means someone was lying to [...]

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February 13, 2008

FRI. FEB. 8: ON POINTE!
Tues | Feb 5 Super Tuesday is here and Californians go to the polls to exercise their right to vote for whoever they want. They respond by reiterating their love of term limits, thereby limiting their right to vote for whoever they want. Except, of course, when it comes to Warren [...]

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February 6, 2008

Tues | Jan 29 We live in a world of uncertainty. The economy is good, then it’s bad. The stock market is down in the morning, up in the afternoon. Iraq? God knows (I mean that.) The next President? Is it the woman? The black guy? The white dude? The other white dude with the [...]

VECTOR CONTROL

January 30, 2008

Tues | Jan 22 Rumors of rain.
Wed | Jan 23 Dear God! Is that . . . WETNESS!?
Thurs | Jan 24 A tornado warning. In Long Beach. How gauche. Look, we’re earthquake people, so much more primal and old money. Ditto mudslides and brush fires with their spectacular images of destroyed multimillion-dollar homes. Tornadoes? So [...]

 

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