You read this on the Los Angeles Times website yesterday, and in the Press-Telegram today–but if you didn’t (or if you’d just like to see it summarized below):

Two environmental groups are giving the Port of Long Beach 90 days to throttle back on its diesel soot and smog–or face a lawsuit. In. Federal. Court.

Those two groups are the Natural Resources Defense Council and the Coalition for a Safe Environment; and on Wednesday they delivered a 13-page ultimatum to Mario Cordero, president of the Long Beach Board of Harbor Commissioners, port Executive Director Richard Steinke, and Long Beach Mayor Bob Foster.

“There need to be penalties for failing to comply with the clean air plan, and right now, there are none,” NRDC attorney Adrian Martinez told the P-T. “As it is, all the penalties are on the people who live and work in this area and have to breathe this mess.”

Port and city officials, naturally, expressed their dismay at what transpired–given that the Long Beach and Los Angeles ports agreed last year on a Clean Air Action Plan that would reduce port pollution 45% by 2012.

“We plan to be finished with this plan very soon,” Cordero told the Times. “So I’m surprised by this action being taken.”

So was Foster, in the P-T: “Sure,” Hizzoner said, “everybody would like to move faster, but the fact is, both these ports have done a good job, and I don’t see any lack of enthusiasm or political will to get this done.”

And so was the man whose ability to speak intelligently on just about any topic under the sun makes him the World’s Coolest Guy Ever to working reporters (plus he’s a genuinely nice guy): Jack Kyser, chief economist with the Los Angeles County Economic Development Corp.

Throttle the Port, Kyser said, and we could end up choking off our access to, for instance, just about everything made by Apple and beginning with the letter “i.” (Many Apple products proclaim proudly on the packages that they’re designed in California–and produced overseas.)

And we need them, now that we don’t make much steel any more. The economist’s solution? Hoarding–though, of course he wasn’t so boorish as to come right out and say it.

“Start stocking up on your tennis shoes and other necessities,” Kyser said in the Times.

Done and done!

Tags: Adrian Martinez, apple, Board of Harbor Commissioners President Mario Cordero, California, Clean Air Action Plan, Coalition for a Safe Environment, iphone, ipod, Jack Kyser, Long Beach, Long Beach Mayor Bob Foster, Los Angeles County Economic Development Corp., Natural Resources Defense Council, Port of Long Beach, PORT OF LOS ANGELES, port pollution, Richard Steinke, Southern California, The District Weekly, Theo Douglas