I wasn’t looking for a new hair product, but there it was, For Men Hair Slick, prancing in front of my eyes at The Body Shop. My girlfriend was off somewhere—the temptation was too much. I stared and I paced. I picked it up, I put it down. After a few laps around the shop, I asked the woman behind the counter for help. I told her how I used Royal Crown and had no complaints, yet some higher power was drawing me to this strange brown tube. She snickered at the mention of Royal Crown and explained how much her young son liked it. Great, I always wanted to be cool with elementary school students.

Now, one can of Royal Crown lasts at least two months and costs less than $5. This newfangled thingy came with considerably less product and ran nearly $10. I’m almost positive I wasn’t high, but I bought it anyway. Once I got home, I put the tube next to that beautiful red and green cylinder with the grey top and could feel Royal Crown giving me the stink eye. I deserved it. Later that day, I hesitantly applied the new stuff to my hair. It had been the case that Royal Crown would command control of hair. Once applied, my dyed-black locks were no longer mine; I just rented them. But this new goo left my hair feeling like it was clean, a sensation I know only after going to the barber. There was no way this sorry excuse for a men’s hair product would hold my immaculately combed pompadour. But it did.

Three hours later my hair was still in place and felt bouncy and fresh, two words never used to describe Royal Crown. It’s a month later and my can of Royal Crown sits untouched. I never thought I’d change products, but I’m glad I did. No more stains every time I lean against something. No more unwashable product. I’ve recently started golfing, but this takes the cake as far as proof of my further descent into becoming an old man.

FOR MEN HAIR SLICK AVAILABLE AT THE BODY SHOP 5013 E SECOND ST | LONG BEACH 90803 | 562.987.1147 | BODYSHOP.COM

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