I’ve just watched “Buttock Cleft Confidential” on dTV, and now I’m confused. Not because of the free-form dancing, transvestitism, and hint of prostitution– such on camera behavior by reporters will be familiar to those who remember what the NBC Nightly News was like before Tom Brokaw’s retirement. It wasn’t the title that confused me. I know what “buttock” means. I know what “cleft” means. Therefore, even though I didn’t know it was a legal term, I had no trouble discerning what “buttock cleft” means.

No, what confused me was the quote from the police report claiming a dancer “ground her buttock genitalia”. As stated above, I know what “buttock” means. Furthermore, I know what “genitalia” means. And without wishing to boast, I even have a certain hard-won practical knowledge of female anatomy. But I have no idea what “buttock genitalia” is. Does this mean that California women have some sort of anatomical bonus? And if so, is this what The Beach Boys meant when they sang, “I wish they all could be California girls”?

Tags: buttock cleft, buttock genitalia, California girls, dTV, free-form dancing, hint of prostitution, The Beach Boys, Tom Brokaw, transvestitism